167. Befriending Your Future Self
Do you treat your future self like a friend?
Do you set her up for success?
Do you go above and beyond to ensure she’s going to have good experiences?
Or do you make decisions that set her up to fail?
If you want to have a satisfying life and career, one of the most powerful things you can do is be a good friend to your future self.
Think through what she needs and make sure she has it.
Consider what would support her and get it set up ahead of time.
Make sure she has the resources she needs to do well.
And you can do all of this while also being a friend to your current self.
(It’s not an either/or nor is it about sacrificing your current experiences to have better ones later on.)
A friendship, at the end of the day, isn’t just about one person.
It’s about creating connection, delighting in each other, and working together to build something that suits you both.
This makes sense for friendships with other people and it also makes sense for the friendship between current you and future you.
Everything you want for your future is built right now, in the present.
Finding fun and enjoyable ways to create that future means current you and future you can both have what they want.
So what’s your relationship with your future self?
Are you setting her up to have a great day, week, month, year, or decade?
Tune in this week to learn all about how to start developing a loving friendship with your future self.
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WHAT YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:
Why many of us have fraught and difficult relationships with our past, present, and future selves.
How befriending your future self allows for delight, fun, and satisfaction.
The power of befriending your future self.
How to deepen the friendship you have with your future self.
LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE:
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FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:
This week we’re talking about Befriending Your Future Self.
The Satisfied AF podcast is the place to learn how to create a life and career that’s wildly delicious. Want a steamier sex life? We’ve got you. Want a more satisfying career? We’ll cover that too. And you can be sure we’ll spend lots of time talking about how to build connected, fun relationships that can handle life’s ups and downs. No matter what goals you’re working on, this show will help you create a one of a kind life that is just right for you. Join me, life and career coach Kori Linn and each week I’ll give you lots of practical tips, tools, and proven strategies to help you create all the satisfaction your heart desires.
Hello, hello, hello. Happy Wednesday and Happy New Year. I hope your holidays were glorious, if you celebrated. And I’m pretty excited to kick off January with you. So the subject we’re talking about this week has been near and dear to my heart for a long time and it really kind of infiltrates everything I talk about in all kinds of areas of my life. And that topic, of course, is befriending your future self.
So this is something that I think is really a key to many of the amazing things I’ve been able to accomplish in my own life, is this idea of thinking of my future self as a friend. Thinking of my future self as someone I’m willing to do hard labor and effort for. Thinking of my future self as someone who deserves my respect and as someone who I care about, I value. I value her, I value her life, I value her experiences.
So a long, long time ago, before Alex Luchini and I met and got together, I did date other people. And one of those people, I remember he would talk about like, fuck that guy, kind of about his future self. Things like staying up later than he knew was going to feel good to his body the next day, or drinking more than he knew was going to feel good to his body the next day.
And on the one hand, I know that he was joking. It was just like, funny, tongue in cheek, like fuck that guy. But on the other hand, I also saw a lot of his choices be very much a fuck you to his future self. Like, I’m going to do what I want to do in the moment, and you’re going to have consequences later and that’s your problem. And I actually think a lot of people make decisions in this way, like I’m going to have what I want now, consequences be damned.
And I get in that headspace too, sometimes. So I don’t want y’all thinking that I’m like, oh, that never happens to me. It for sure does. But as a choice, as the way I’m living my life intentionally, I prefer to do the opposite. I prefer to create a friendship with my future self so that I am often setting things up to be really spectacular for her. And I want you to take a minute and think about, like, what’s your relationship with your future self?
Are you setting your future self up to have a really lovely day tomorrow? Are you setting your future self up to have a really lovely, whatever, year, life, day six months from now, a year from now, five years from now, 10 years from now. There’s even a bias, I can’t remember the name of it right this moment, where humans will often, if they’re given the choice between a smaller financial reward soon/immediately or a larger financial reward later, like significantly later, like a year later, they’ll often take the one they can get soon or right away.
And I think this also has some overlap with the idea of the ability to delay gratification versus the desire for instant gratification. But I love thinking of it through the lens of befriending your future self because a friendship isn’t about one person or the other. It’s about both people. It’s about connection. It’s about delight. It’s about working together and having a good time and loving each other.
So whereas I think sometimes with the idea of delaying gratification, it can be almost like, well, I can’t have any gratification now, so I can have all the gratification later. Or like that ex of mine, like I’m going to have all the gratification now and later make him fucking deal with it, right?
Versus a friendship is like, oh, here’s what I would like to have happen and here’s what my friend would like to have happen. And maybe there’s an option where both of us can get what we want and everyone can be happy and it can be agreeable and enjoyable and the friendship can deepen and we can actually become capable of things that we weren’t in the beginning of the friendship.
Like if you think about a friendship in the beginning, like you’re just getting to know each other, whereas as the friendship deepens, sometimes you do have conflict. And then how do you move through that conflict with that friend, right? So if there’s something where current you and future you are at odds about what they want, how can you navigate that conflict in friendship with your future self, versus like, “Fuck you, future self, you’re just going to get what you get.”
I think this is a really powerful idea all the time, but I especially think so for kicking off a new year. The idea of like, okay, in a little bit less than 12 months, we’re going to be at the end of the year again. I’m going to be looking back like, what did I do in 2024? What did I accomplish? Which of my goals did I achieve? How did I move myself towards my bigger goals that aren’t achievable in one year?
And I think a lot of times people have fraught and difficult relationships with themselves as they think through their goals of like sometimes we don’t move forward as fast as we want or sometimes we take a couple steps forward, a couple of steps back, sometimes things turn out to be much harder than we thought they would be.
And something I see with so many of my clients and something I’ve seen in my own self, also, like in my self-coaching and the coaching I’ve done with folks I’ve hired is like an animosity almost towards myself when I’m not able to do what I said I’d do or do the things I want to do. And I see this with my clients, too. I see it with friends. I see it with all kinds of people. I see it in TV characters. This thing where we belittle ourselves, beat ourselves up, judge ourselves, shame ourselves, criticize. It’s not very friendly, right?
And I just think that there’s a better way. And I think the better way is friendship. And again, that doesn’t mean we never have to have hard conversations. Sometimes we have hard conversations in friendships. Sometimes we have hard conversations between future self and current self. But I think it allows this really delightful, delicious, fun frame that can help you both have a more enjoyable experience in your day to day and also help you actually achieve those goals, right?
Because when you think through like, okay, it’s Wednesday, what am I doing with the rest of this week? What am I doing with this weekend? A lot of times we kind of get stuck in like our day to day vision of like, here’s what I have to do, or here’s what’s on my calendar, or here’s what I feel like doing this weekend. But in order to create the lives we dream of, in order to create those wildly satisfying futures that we want and crave and dream of, sometimes we need to make bigger moves too. Bolder moves.
Sometimes we need to get ourselves out of this is just the day to day of how I run my life. And in order to do that, we need to get to know like, who is our future self? What does she want? What is her life like? And then we need to start to build that from the ground up. Because the future is built in the now. The things you do today, tomorrow, this weekend, that is you building the future.
And so often people try to build future A by doing actions that don’t align with future A. They’re doing actions that maybe align with future B or future C or future D. If you want future A, now is the time that you build it, right? It’s like going on a road trip. If you want to drive from Seattle to Miami, you have to understand, first of all, the general direction that that is. And then second of all, like what are the roads that are going to take you there.
You might end up driving on roads that are actually like not directly taking you towards Miami. Like if you’ve ever been on a road trip, sometimes you’re even driving 100% the wrong direction, which doesn’t make sense, but roads aren’t straight lines exactly.
So you need to both know generally, where are you trying to go and also like, what are the roads you’re going to take? And what are the podcasts you’re going to listen to? Where are you going to stop and get gas? That’s on a literal road trip, but all of these things metaphorically have value when you think about building your future.
I also get stuck sometimes just fantasizing and wanting something to just arrive and be dropped from the sky. And I think that would be so fun. And occasionally things like that do happen, right? We stumble into things, we ask the universe for something and it does just show up. I have, for sure, actually had that happen.
But a lot of times, we’re going to have to build it ourselves. A lot of times, if you want a pie, you’re either going to need to get the ingredients and bake the pie, or you’re going to need to go to the grocery store and get the pie. Once in a great while a pie might just show up, like someone might just show up at your house with a pie.
You get to choose for you, but for me, it’s my desire to build the life I want. And then if delights and presents show up, I’m going to welcome those in and savor that. But I’m not going to wait for it to necessarily just fall in. And, for me, that is what it means to be in friendship with my future self, is I’m building her life. I’m building her life bit by bit, day by day.
Like when Alex and I have a conflict and I feel that urge inside of me to pop off and say something snarky and I hold that urge and I’m like with the urge and I’m like, yeah, urge, I feel you but we’re not going to do that because what I’m building is the future with Alex. And my future self, who is able to navigate conflict with grace and love and compassion, again, not perfectly, but those are the intentions, those are the ideals that I want to be directing myself towards.
That moment allows me to anchor in and to know where I’m going and to move towards it, even if I’m not 100% there. And when I live in friendship with my future self, even when things are hard, they’re a gift that I’m giving to me, right? They’re a gift that I’m giving to current me and to future me. And it’s like laying the groundwork. It’s laying the foundation to get to have what I want and to get to live by my values.
So take a moment to think about what you want your life to be like today, next week, next month, a year from now, five years from now, 10 years from now. What do you want your life to be like in retirement? What do you want your life to be like when you’re elderly? And in what ways are you already building that?
There probably are already ways you’re building that future. And there probably already are ways that you’re in friendship with your future self. And let’s celebrate that shit. That’s incredible. Good work. And also, what are the ways you’re in conflict with your future self? Are there things you want your future to be or have, but how you’re showing up day to day either doesn’t align or directly contradicts those things?
Where are you having almost an enemy relationship with your future self? Are there any areas where you, like my ex, are like, “Yeah, fuck that guy,” about your future self? Are there areas where you’re doing what feels good in the moment and it’s creating problems for your future self? Are there areas where you’re treating your future self like a stranger or like someone you don’t know, like an acquaintance?
Are there relationships you’re in with your future self that don’t feel like friendship? And would you like to shift that? I’m pitching you that being in friendship with your future self just feels really yummy. And just it makes it so much easier to create a life that feels really good in the moment and also moves you towards your goals, both little and big.
You’re allowed to have whatever relationship you want. But I just think why not friends? Or why not lovers, right? I actually saw a meme the other day that was like enemies to lovers, but with myself. And I really feel like that’s what my coaching journey has been. And still continues to be because, y’all, it’s not over yet.
I’m using the tools I teach y’all all the time, imperfectly, and having a messy, glorious life over here that is hilarious, involves a lot of looking at my own thoughts and my own patterns and crying a lot. That’s what I’m doing over here when I’m not coaching y’all.
But I really love that idea of like, I used to treat myself like an enemy in the moment, and I also was not setting future Kori up to have a great time a lot of the times. And now I feel like future Kori and I, we’re such a fucking team. Everyone’s having a lot of joy. Sometimes we’re working hard. We’re getting it done. And when things aren’t working, we’re kind of coming together like a team to be like, this doesn’t feel right. Do we want more of something? Do we want less of something? What could make this more enjoyable?
I just think it’s such a great way to live life. And I also really, truly believe it makes it so much more likely you’re going to get whatever you want, whatever it is. You’re going to achieve those goals, whatever they are. But here’s the even better thing, even when you don’t or when you’re on the way to achieving the goals but you’re not there yet, it’s just so much more delightful to be in friendship with someone.
It’s like the difference between taking a road trip with someone who yells and belittles you the whole time, that’s going to make the drive from Seattle to Florida feel real fucking long. Or taking a road trip with your friend, maybe with your best friend. With someone who delights and amazes you. With someone who looks out for you and you look out for them. That’s what’s possible for you.
Also, figuring out who you want your future self to be and then befriending her, that’s how you’re going to become her or him, or them. Befriending your future self, knowing who that person is and what they’re like, gives you a blueprint for becoming that person, for becoming him or her or them.
If you’re like, oh, what I really want is five years from now to run my own business and be happily partnered and own my own home and here are the qualities I’m going to have as a person, and I don’t have all of those qualities. It’s not about shitting on who you are now, you’re lovely and wonderful and whole and deeply worthy. And also, you might want some stuff, whether it’s a house, or the ability to demonstrate patience.
You might want things that you don’t already have. And you can build them. And you can build them with love for yourself. And you can build them with friendship for yourself. And you can envision this future you and you can ask him or her or them, hey, how do I become more like you? And you can get their advice on things. They can almost mentor you.
And you can help them understand you when they’re like, hey, we want to get here already. You can be like, hey, this is where I am now. So I understand you want to get there, but we’ve got to go from where we are now to where that is. And maybe future self thinks you’re starting at a different place and y’all need to slow the ride down because things aren’t always enjoyable when we rush and push and think we need to be somewhere else.
So, again, this is a friendship that goes both ways. It’s like I’m going to go grocery shopping a little bit later today so that my future self and Alex’s future self can have the groceries that we want to have later tonight and tomorrow and the rest of this week. In the moment me probably doesn’t feel like going to the grocery store. But I’m willing to do it for future self. And also, future self understands that I’m not just going to go get it immediately, it needs to fit into my day because it needs to delight both parties.
It needs to delight current me and it needs to delight future me because that’s what friendship is all about. It’s not one or the other, it’s having a fun time for everyone included.
And for those of you who have a clear vision of who your future self is and what you want that to be like, and you’re really struggling to put that in action and make it actually happen in your day to day, come sign up for a consult and let’s have a conversation because that’s exactly the kind of thing that coaching can help you with.
Coaching helps you understand why if you want to become a certain future self so badly, you may still be doing things that directly contradict that. A coach is a person who can help you navigate and build that friendship between current you and future you.
And if you have no idea what future self wants to do or what kind of future you want to build, that’s also a great reason to book a consult because another thing coaching can do is help you figure out what you even want to work on. And then once you figure that out, we help you get there.
Wherever you are in the journey to becoming your future self and the journey to befriending your future self, it is always useful to have someone in your corner to help you untangle that process and find ways to make it easier, faster and more fun. And I would love to have a conversation about working with you and supporting you in that way.
All right, that’s what I have for y’all. Have a lovely week. Happy New Year and I will talk to you next time.
Thank you for joining me for this week’s episode of Satisfied AF. If you are ready to create a wildly delicious life and have way more fun than you ever thought possible, visit www.korilinn.com to see how I can help. See you next week.
The Satisfied AF podcast is the place to learn how to create a life and career that’s wildly delicious. Want a steamier sex life? We’ve got you. Want a more satisfying career? We’ll cover that too. And you can be sure we’ll spend lots of time talking about how to build connected, fun relationships that can handle life’s ups and downs. No matter what goals you’re working on, this show will help you create a one of a kind life that is just right for you. Join me, life and career coach Kori Linn and each week I’ll give you lots of practical tips, tools, and proven strategies to help you create all the satisfaction your heart desires.
Hello, hello, hello. Happy Wednesday and Happy New Year. I hope your holidays were glorious, if you celebrated. And I’m pretty excited to kick off January with you. So the subject we’re talking about this week has been near and dear to my heart for a long time and it really kind of infiltrates everything I talk about in all kinds of areas of my life. And that topic, of course, is befriending your future self.
So this is something that I think is really a key to many of the amazing things I’ve been able to accomplish in my own life, is this idea of thinking of my future self as a friend. Thinking of my future self as someone I’m willing to do hard labor and effort for. Thinking of my future self as someone who deserves my respect and as someone who I care about, I value. I value her, I value her life, I value her experiences.
So a long, long time ago, before Alex Luchini and I met and got together, I did date other people. And one of those people, I remember he would talk about like, fuck that guy, kind of about his future self. Things like staying up later than he knew was going to feel good to his body the next day, or drinking more than he knew was going to feel good to his body the next day.
And on the one hand, I know that he was joking. It was just like, funny, tongue in cheek, like fuck that guy. But on the other hand, I also saw a lot of his choices be very much a fuck you to his future self. Like, I’m going to do what I want to do in the moment, and you’re going to have consequences later and that’s your problem. And I actually think a lot of people make decisions in this way, like I’m going to have what I want now, consequences be damned.
And I get in that headspace too, sometimes. So I don’t want y’all thinking that I’m like, oh, that never happens to me. It for sure does. But as a choice, as the way I’m living my life intentionally, I prefer to do the opposite. I prefer to create a friendship with my future self so that I am often setting things up to be really spectacular for her. And I want you to take a minute and think about, like, what’s your relationship with your future self?
Are you setting your future self up to have a really lovely day tomorrow? Are you setting your future self up to have a really lovely, whatever, year, life, day six months from now, a year from now, five years from now, 10 years from now. There’s even a bias, I can’t remember the name of it right this moment, where humans will often, if they’re given the choice between a smaller financial reward soon/immediately or a larger financial reward later, like significantly later, like a year later, they’ll often take the one they can get soon or right away.
And I think this also has some overlap with the idea of the ability to delay gratification versus the desire for instant gratification. But I love thinking of it through the lens of befriending your future self because a friendship isn’t about one person or the other. It’s about both people. It’s about connection. It’s about delight. It’s about working together and having a good time and loving each other.
So whereas I think sometimes with the idea of delaying gratification, it can be almost like, well, I can’t have any gratification now, so I can have all the gratification later. Or like that ex of mine, like I’m going to have all the gratification now and later make him fucking deal with it, right?
Versus a friendship is like, oh, here’s what I would like to have happen and here’s what my friend would like to have happen. And maybe there’s an option where both of us can get what we want and everyone can be happy and it can be agreeable and enjoyable and the friendship can deepen and we can actually become capable of things that we weren’t in the beginning of the friendship.
Like if you think about a friendship in the beginning, like you’re just getting to know each other, whereas as the friendship deepens, sometimes you do have conflict. And then how do you move through that conflict with that friend, right? So if there’s something where current you and future you are at odds about what they want, how can you navigate that conflict in friendship with your future self, versus like, “Fuck you, future self, you’re just going to get what you get.”
I think this is a really powerful idea all the time, but I especially think so for kicking off a new year. The idea of like, okay, in a little bit less than 12 months, we’re going to be at the end of the year again. I’m going to be looking back like, what did I do in 2024? What did I accomplish? Which of my goals did I achieve? How did I move myself towards my bigger goals that aren’t achievable in one year?
And I think a lot of times people have fraught and difficult relationships with themselves as they think through their goals of like sometimes we don’t move forward as fast as we want or sometimes we take a couple steps forward, a couple of steps back, sometimes things turn out to be much harder than we thought they would be.
And something I see with so many of my clients and something I’ve seen in my own self, also, like in my self-coaching and the coaching I’ve done with folks I’ve hired is like an animosity almost towards myself when I’m not able to do what I said I’d do or do the things I want to do. And I see this with my clients, too. I see it with friends. I see it with all kinds of people. I see it in TV characters. This thing where we belittle ourselves, beat ourselves up, judge ourselves, shame ourselves, criticize. It’s not very friendly, right?
And I just think that there’s a better way. And I think the better way is friendship. And again, that doesn’t mean we never have to have hard conversations. Sometimes we have hard conversations in friendships. Sometimes we have hard conversations between future self and current self. But I think it allows this really delightful, delicious, fun frame that can help you both have a more enjoyable experience in your day to day and also help you actually achieve those goals, right?
Because when you think through like, okay, it’s Wednesday, what am I doing with the rest of this week? What am I doing with this weekend? A lot of times we kind of get stuck in like our day to day vision of like, here’s what I have to do, or here’s what’s on my calendar, or here’s what I feel like doing this weekend. But in order to create the lives we dream of, in order to create those wildly satisfying futures that we want and crave and dream of, sometimes we need to make bigger moves too. Bolder moves.
Sometimes we need to get ourselves out of this is just the day to day of how I run my life. And in order to do that, we need to get to know like, who is our future self? What does she want? What is her life like? And then we need to start to build that from the ground up. Because the future is built in the now. The things you do today, tomorrow, this weekend, that is you building the future.
And so often people try to build future A by doing actions that don’t align with future A. They’re doing actions that maybe align with future B or future C or future D. If you want future A, now is the time that you build it, right? It’s like going on a road trip. If you want to drive from Seattle to Miami, you have to understand, first of all, the general direction that that is. And then second of all, like what are the roads that are going to take you there.
You might end up driving on roads that are actually like not directly taking you towards Miami. Like if you’ve ever been on a road trip, sometimes you’re even driving 100% the wrong direction, which doesn’t make sense, but roads aren’t straight lines exactly.
So you need to both know generally, where are you trying to go and also like, what are the roads you’re going to take? And what are the podcasts you’re going to listen to? Where are you going to stop and get gas? That’s on a literal road trip, but all of these things metaphorically have value when you think about building your future.
I also get stuck sometimes just fantasizing and wanting something to just arrive and be dropped from the sky. And I think that would be so fun. And occasionally things like that do happen, right? We stumble into things, we ask the universe for something and it does just show up. I have, for sure, actually had that happen.
But a lot of times, we’re going to have to build it ourselves. A lot of times, if you want a pie, you’re either going to need to get the ingredients and bake the pie, or you’re going to need to go to the grocery store and get the pie. Once in a great while a pie might just show up, like someone might just show up at your house with a pie.
You get to choose for you, but for me, it’s my desire to build the life I want. And then if delights and presents show up, I’m going to welcome those in and savor that. But I’m not going to wait for it to necessarily just fall in. And, for me, that is what it means to be in friendship with my future self, is I’m building her life. I’m building her life bit by bit, day by day.
Like when Alex and I have a conflict and I feel that urge inside of me to pop off and say something snarky and I hold that urge and I’m like with the urge and I’m like, yeah, urge, I feel you but we’re not going to do that because what I’m building is the future with Alex. And my future self, who is able to navigate conflict with grace and love and compassion, again, not perfectly, but those are the intentions, those are the ideals that I want to be directing myself towards.
That moment allows me to anchor in and to know where I’m going and to move towards it, even if I’m not 100% there. And when I live in friendship with my future self, even when things are hard, they’re a gift that I’m giving to me, right? They’re a gift that I’m giving to current me and to future me. And it’s like laying the groundwork. It’s laying the foundation to get to have what I want and to get to live by my values.
So take a moment to think about what you want your life to be like today, next week, next month, a year from now, five years from now, 10 years from now. What do you want your life to be like in retirement? What do you want your life to be like when you’re elderly? And in what ways are you already building that?
There probably are already ways you’re building that future. And there probably already are ways that you’re in friendship with your future self. And let’s celebrate that shit. That’s incredible. Good work. And also, what are the ways you’re in conflict with your future self? Are there things you want your future to be or have, but how you’re showing up day to day either doesn’t align or directly contradicts those things?
Where are you having almost an enemy relationship with your future self? Are there any areas where you, like my ex, are like, “Yeah, fuck that guy,” about your future self? Are there areas where you’re doing what feels good in the moment and it’s creating problems for your future self? Are there areas where you’re treating your future self like a stranger or like someone you don’t know, like an acquaintance?
Are there relationships you’re in with your future self that don’t feel like friendship? And would you like to shift that? I’m pitching you that being in friendship with your future self just feels really yummy. And just it makes it so much easier to create a life that feels really good in the moment and also moves you towards your goals, both little and big.
You’re allowed to have whatever relationship you want. But I just think why not friends? Or why not lovers, right? I actually saw a meme the other day that was like enemies to lovers, but with myself. And I really feel like that’s what my coaching journey has been. And still continues to be because, y’all, it’s not over yet.
I’m using the tools I teach y’all all the time, imperfectly, and having a messy, glorious life over here that is hilarious, involves a lot of looking at my own thoughts and my own patterns and crying a lot. That’s what I’m doing over here when I’m not coaching y’all.
But I really love that idea of like, I used to treat myself like an enemy in the moment, and I also was not setting future Kori up to have a great time a lot of the times. And now I feel like future Kori and I, we’re such a fucking team. Everyone’s having a lot of joy. Sometimes we’re working hard. We’re getting it done. And when things aren’t working, we’re kind of coming together like a team to be like, this doesn’t feel right. Do we want more of something? Do we want less of something? What could make this more enjoyable?
I just think it’s such a great way to live life. And I also really, truly believe it makes it so much more likely you’re going to get whatever you want, whatever it is. You’re going to achieve those goals, whatever they are. But here’s the even better thing, even when you don’t or when you’re on the way to achieving the goals but you’re not there yet, it’s just so much more delightful to be in friendship with someone.
It’s like the difference between taking a road trip with someone who yells and belittles you the whole time, that’s going to make the drive from Seattle to Florida feel real fucking long. Or taking a road trip with your friend, maybe with your best friend. With someone who delights and amazes you. With someone who looks out for you and you look out for them. That’s what’s possible for you.
Also, figuring out who you want your future self to be and then befriending her, that’s how you’re going to become her or him, or them. Befriending your future self, knowing who that person is and what they’re like, gives you a blueprint for becoming that person, for becoming him or her or them.
If you’re like, oh, what I really want is five years from now to run my own business and be happily partnered and own my own home and here are the qualities I’m going to have as a person, and I don’t have all of those qualities. It’s not about shitting on who you are now, you’re lovely and wonderful and whole and deeply worthy. And also, you might want some stuff, whether it’s a house, or the ability to demonstrate patience.
You might want things that you don’t already have. And you can build them. And you can build them with love for yourself. And you can build them with friendship for yourself. And you can envision this future you and you can ask him or her or them, hey, how do I become more like you? And you can get their advice on things. They can almost mentor you.
And you can help them understand you when they’re like, hey, we want to get here already. You can be like, hey, this is where I am now. So I understand you want to get there, but we’ve got to go from where we are now to where that is. And maybe future self thinks you’re starting at a different place and y’all need to slow the ride down because things aren’t always enjoyable when we rush and push and think we need to be somewhere else.
So, again, this is a friendship that goes both ways. It’s like I’m going to go grocery shopping a little bit later today so that my future self and Alex’s future self can have the groceries that we want to have later tonight and tomorrow and the rest of this week. In the moment me probably doesn’t feel like going to the grocery store. But I’m willing to do it for future self. And also, future self understands that I’m not just going to go get it immediately, it needs to fit into my day because it needs to delight both parties.
It needs to delight current me and it needs to delight future me because that’s what friendship is all about. It’s not one or the other, it’s having a fun time for everyone included.
And for those of you who have a clear vision of who your future self is and what you want that to be like, and you’re really struggling to put that in action and make it actually happen in your day to day, come sign up for a consult and let’s have a conversation because that’s exactly the kind of thing that coaching can help you with.
Coaching helps you understand why if you want to become a certain future self so badly, you may still be doing things that directly contradict that. A coach is a person who can help you navigate and build that friendship between current you and future you.
And if you have no idea what future self wants to do or what kind of future you want to build, that’s also a great reason to book a consult because another thing coaching can do is help you figure out what you even want to work on. And then once you figure that out, we help you get there.
Wherever you are in the journey to becoming your future self and the journey to befriending your future self, it is always useful to have someone in your corner to help you untangle that process and find ways to make it easier, faster and more fun. And I would love to have a conversation about working with you and supporting you in that way.
All right, that’s what I have for y’all. Have a lovely week. Happy New Year and I will talk to you next time.
Thank you for joining me for this week’s episode of Satisfied AF. If you are ready to create a wildly delicious life and have way more fun than you ever thought possible, visit www.korilinn.com to see how I can help. See you next week.
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