143. Building a Supportive Ecosystem
Want to…
Yell at your kids less?
Land a dreamy new job?
Have a more connected relationship with your spouse?
What’s your plan to get there? What kind of ecosystem do you need to create for yourself in order to accomplish your goals?
Do you know what skills you need to develop, what systems and processes you need to put in place, and what habits you need to establish?
Or do you just have a vague sense that you need to be better, work harder, and then it will all come together?
Good news / bad news: it will NOT just all come together.
Better news: you don’t need to be a better person or work harder.
What you need is to set yourself up for success by building an ecosystem that supports you as you work towards your goal.
You can’t just decide to yell at your kids less and then do that.
You need to understand why you’re yelling at them. You need to understand what skills and habits are required for you to behave differently. You need to know which supportive resources would be helpful and which are absolutely essential to make the shift. And you need the self-kindness to walk yourself all the way through the transition, even when you f*ck up.
Likewise, dreamy new jobs and connected AF relationships don’t just fall from the skies.
(I wish!)
And in order to land the dreamy new job or build the yummy new-and-improved relationship, you need to build a supportive ecosystem.
You need to be clear not just on what you WANT but also on what will SUPPORT you in your pursuit of it.
No matter what you’re working on, building a supportive ecosystem is a tool you can use to move forward in a joyful and meaningful way.
Join me this week to hear how to start building a supportive ecosystem that’s conducive to your goals, and why doing so is the secret to creating progress on whatever you might be struggling with right now.
Want to create a wildly delicious life and career? Let’s work together.
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Want something a little more extra?
I have just the thing.
My year-long coaching and mentorship program, Unhinged AF, is the most extra, extravagant offering I currently have. One-on-one coaching, in-person or virtual deep dive days, and special surprises. If this sounds like just the thing for you, book a consult call and let’s discuss a customized program that’s all about helping you break free from your current life and career to build something that truly blows your mind.
WHAT YOU’LL LEARN FROM THIS EPISODE:
The 2 different types of ecosystems you might need to support the goals you have.
How I’ve built a supportive ecosystem for my life and business.
What happens when we use the idea of building a supportive ecosystem against ourselves.
How the framework of a supportive ecosystem helps you move forward in the way you want.
LISTEN TO THE FULL EPISODE:
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The L Word: Generation Q - TV series
FULL EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:
This week we’re talking about Building a Supportive Ecosystem.
You are listening to Love Your Job Before You Leave It, the podcast for ambitious, high-achieving women who are ready to stop feeling stressed about work and kiss burnout goodbye forever. Whether you’re starting a business or staying in your day job, this show will give you the coaching and guidance you need to start loving your work today. Here’s your host, Career Coach, Kori Linn.
Hello, darlings, Happy Wednesday. I hope this finds you very well. I’m doing okay. I actually am a little sad. So I have been watching The L Word Generation Q, which came out a while ago. I think it started coming out before the pandemic and I don’t even know when the other two seasons came out.
But I have memories of watching season one at a friend’s house in Seattle. And I sort of didn’t keep up with it. I often don’t keep up with shows as they come out live. The only reason I watched it when it came out is because so many friends were watching it that we were having little watch parties, which was super fun, and I did enjoy that. But I like to binge things, so I like to wait until they’re out and then I can just watch them as fast as I want to.
So it kind of fell off my radar for a while and then I was like, oh, I’m going to watch that now. And then when I went to watch it I realized that it had been canceled after season three. And then I was super bummed, but I still wanted to see what happened because I had followed these characters through season one and I watched all the original L Word seasons also. So some of the characters are in both, right? The Generation Q is kind of a continuation with new characters, it’s not a total spin-off.
Anyways, so I was preemptively already sad that it was going to not keep going forever and ever, amen. But I watched it anyway and it was really enjoyable. Like I really liked The L Word Generation Q. And then, of course, I ran out of episodes because there were only two seasons for me to watch.
And it was funny, as it was coming down to the final episode of season three, I just slowed down the speed at which I was watching them. It was like I just was like, no. I was grumpy and upset that it wasn’t going to continue and then I kind of avoided it a little bit because I was like trying to – It wasn’t really savoring, it was sort of like the antithesis of savoring, like avoidance where I was like, I don’t want it to be over so I’m just going to ignore it. And then finally I did watch it a few days ago.
And, of course, I don’t think they knew the show was going to get canceled, so there was lots of – Like there was some stuff that kind of came together, but there were lots of little pieces of like, what will happen with this? And what will happen with these people?
And I just feel a bittersweet longing and sadness that I actually did look up, like is there fanfiction? And there is, but fanfiction is usually about alternate universes, I mean, I don’t know. Usually, I don’t read that much fanfiction, although I do like it. But it doesn’t carry on the main line of the show. And that’s what I really want.
So I’m just feeling some sad feelings. And that’s okay, it’s a totally normal part of human life. Feeling disappointed is not my favorite emotion, but it is a beautiful thing. There was something I really liked and enjoyed and it’s over now. And that tends to be what happens with everything we like and enjoy because things are finite, right? Even life. So just to go super dark and deep right away. Happy Wednesday, you’re welcome.
Anyways, that’s not what we’re going to talk about today. But if you are having some sadness or some feelings of disappointment, I do have some really good podcasts on those as well and they’re available for you whenever you need them. But today we’re going to talk about how to build a supportive ecosystem.
And this is something I was thinking about because I was coaching a client and they were talking about wanting to do something. And I don’t actually even remember which client it was. Usually I ask the client permission, but I don’t remember who I was coaching about this. But basically, I was like, what needs to be in place for you to be able to do the thing that the client was talking about wanting to do?
And so originally this podcast episode was going to be about the idea of prerequisites, like what are the prerequisites you need to have in place? But I sat down to kind of write my thoughts out a little bit, which is actually really unusual. I just get on here and kind of talk about my ideas. But this time I was like, let me think through an example.
And as I was thinking through the example, I was like, oh, this isn’t just about prerequisites, this is about building a supportive ecosystem. Or the first phrase I actually came up with was a success ecosystem. What is the ecosystem that supports success for you? And there’s two layers to this. There’s what is the ecosystem that supports success for you generally, like in an ongoing way, like a maintenance way? And then there’s also what is the ecosystem that supports success for very specific goals that you have?
So those two ecosystems may be the same, but they may not be the same, right? If you have a very specific goal you’re working on, that may require a customized ecosystem for that specific goal. And then I think there’s a general way in order for you to be satisfied, in order for you to feel peaceful and content, what needs to be in place in your life?
So I think it’s easier to talk about a specific goal ecosystem. And the example I came up with when I was writing notes before recording this was the idea of starting a business and running a business. And it’s interesting, because when you think about the idea of prerequisites, I do think some people use prerequisites to slow themselves down. They’re like, oh, there’s too many things I would have to have in place first. And then they kind of get bogged down in the details of those too many things, then they never get going.
And then I think other people have the opposite thing, right? And neither of these are a problem. They’re just kind of tendencies to be aware of. So what some people do is they just start something without figuring out what the skills and habits and whatever they need to have in place are. And then they figure it out as they go.
And I think there can be benefits to both of those ways of doing things. And there can be drawbacks as well. And I think framing them up in the idea of an ecosystem can be really useful. Like, what do you actually want to make sure it’s already in place in the ecosystem before you get started or as you’re getting started? And what could you build into the ecosystem as you go?
So, as an example, when you think about starting a business, there were a lot of things I did not have in place. It was a bit spontaneous. I mean, I’d been talking about it for years. But kind of making the decision that it was the time when I was going to do the thing, leave the job and start the business, it was a bit spontaneous and kind of a bit tantrum-y, if I’m being really honest. My coach at the time was like, okay, we’re either going to focus on you going all in on loving this job, or we’re going to focus on you going all in and building a business.
And even though my podcast is called Love Your Job Before You Leave It, I decided to go all in on building a business. And there were a lot of great things about that, there were also a lot of not so great things, which is why I think you can do it either way. But the skill of loving your job is actually a great thing to learn while you’re still getting a great paycheck and health care, because I then learned that in my business while trying to support myself with my business. And again, I wouldn’t necessarily go back and change it, but benefits and drawbacks to everything always.
Okay, so a lot of the things I didn’t have in place. But one thing I did have in place when I quit my job was I had some money saved up. Now, in retrospect it wasn’t very much money. At the time I was like, “This is so much money.” But people are always like, oh, have six months of runway or 12 months to be able to support yourself. That’s not how much money I had.
I’ll just share with you, I had $15,000 in cash, which is a lot of money. But also, I was living in Seattle, actually with really, for Seattle, extremely cheap rent. But it wasn’t that much runway. And so there was a period of time where I had spent all that money and I wasn’t really making money yet. And it was not my super favorite thing. It was very uncomfortable.
But at the time, $15,000 was enough for me to be like, okay, I have this in place, I have these resources. And I had paid off my student loans earlier that year. I’d gotten, I think, a bonus. I guess we got yearly bonuses when I was in my corporate job. And I had used that bonus to pay off my student loans. And then I had used the money also to buy the coaching package that I was in as a client where I got the coaching of love it or leave it, basically.
So I had no debt and I had cash. And so that was part of what allowed me to make the somewhat spontaneous decision to leave the job. And there were also other things I had in place that I don’t know that I was really cognizant of. But when I was making my list, I was like, oh yeah.
So the list that I wrote is like, what are the skills you need to have? What are the habits you need to have in place? Is there an amount of money you need to have to feel like you have a supportive ecosystem for whatever particular goal you’re working on?
Housing is always a really big concern. If your housing doesn’t feel stable, it’s going to be much harder probably to focus on a goal or something like that. But also is the particular kind of housing you have, is your housing arrangement conducive to the goal or conducive to the ecosystem you’re trying to build?
Another thing I put on here was sleep, right? So, for me, sleep is really, really important. And probably sleep is really, really important for you, whether you think it is or not because human bodies need sleep to function well. And so I think about people having really big goals or things they want to work on, but if you are not getting good sleep or if you are struggling in other ways, listen, sometimes some of us struggle with sleep. I actually am one of those people.
And so I’m not saying you have to be a perfect or great sleeper in order to go after your goals. That’s not what I’m saying at all. But I am saying if I put in place the work and the effort to have sleep habits that really support me and that I generally get good, for me, sleep doing, then that ecosystem supports everything else I want to do. And that really matters for me.
Other resources you may need to have in place besides just financial resources, is there equipment that you need to have? So these are just all of the things that I wrote down off the top of my head, and there’s probably more. But I think the big ones are like skills and habits, right?
And so for starting a business or running a business, there’s skills like getting clients, serving clients, but there’s also skills like the back side of the business, like billing, there’s marketing, there’s dealing with your taxes, there’s dealing with all kinds of forms and paperwork and making sure you have the proper licenses, there’s getting insurance probably, depending on what kind of business you are.
And if you’re a business, like I’m a business that serves people with a service that is coaching. But if you’re a business that creates products, then there’s all kinds of skills and habits you need to have in place and maybe relationships around who are your suppliers? And where do your products come from? And how do they get from wherever they’re made to you? And then how do they get from you to your clients and stuff like that.
So there’s all of these layers of things. And I’m not saying this for you to get overwhelmed by them. Because again, we don’t want you to get so bogged down in this that you don’t get started. We just want you to think about what’s going to be really meaningful for me to have in place before I get started. What’s the version 1.0 of the ecosystem that I want to have in place before I get started? And then get started and then what are the additional pieces you want to have in place?
And keep in mind that, again, it can be really beautiful to put things in place before you get started. And then you’re definitely still going to have to put some in place after you get started because some stuff you just don’t know you need until you know you need it, or you just don’t know to even put it in place. And then one day someone’s like, blah, blah, blah, blah, and you’re like, oh shit.
For me, it was like someone was like, oh, Seattle business license. And I was like, what? So I had to get a Seattle business license after I’d already been in business for a while. And I basically paid some fees because I told them like, oh, here’s when I actually started my business. And they were like, cool.
So I had to buy like two years’ worth of Seattle business licenses at once. But it wasn’t like I was in big trouble. You’re probably going to miss some stuff when you’re setting up your ecosystem. Don’t beat yourself up about it, that’s just how shit goes and then you just have to navigate it once you learn about it.
Okay, and so those are the business things, but let’s also remember personal habits, right? So, for me, my sleeping habit is really meaningful. My habit of taking long walks every day is really important for me. And it’s important for me in how I feel in my physical body, but I actually think it’s also important for me in how I feel mentally and how quick my brain works and how readily I’m able to use my faculties.
And then I do physical therapy most days. And that’s to help me feel good in my body, which maybe isn’t directly tied to the ecosystem of success for my business. But in some ways it is because if my body is causing me pain, or like last year I had knee pain. Was it last year? I think it was last year. Last year or two years ago, there have been so many times in my life when I’ve had knee pain.
So I had some knee pain and there was the pain of it and there was the rehab activities of going to physical therapy, like to the actual physical therapy office and then doing the physical therapy things at home. But there was the mental anguish too.
And we talk so much about mental anguish on this podcast of my brain being like, oh my God, what if it never doesn’t hurt to walk again? Or what if I can’t take long walks for the rest of my life? Because I’m used to being able to take these long walks and when I had the knee pain there were some days I could barely make it around a block or two blocks.
And it was where I was at the time and that was fine, but then the mental anguish was like, what if it’s like this forever, and like blah, blah, and grieving. And then being mad at myself because did I injure myself with running or whatever activity I’d done before the knee pain?
So in that way, there was actually a high cost to the ecosystem beyond just the actual pain. There was this mental cost and then I had to coach myself about it and soothe myself about it and comfort myself about it. So even though the knee pain doesn’t seem to be directly related to business goals or running a business, it can kind of impact that ecosystem anyways.
So if you have a goal that you’re working on, either a specific goal or an ongoing goal, like in a way starting a business is a short goal. But running a business is an ongoing goal, right? It’s sort of like having a life that’s wildly delicious and delightful, that’s an ongoing goal. You’re going to need an ongoing ecosystem.
And the ecosystem will probably change as you have different new micro goals or little interests or particular obsessions that run for a certain amount of time, as those come along it will ebb and flow. But what do you want to have in place and what can then you learn as you go?
So if you either have a specific goal you’ve been working on, or maybe you have a goal that you haven’t been working on, or if your life is just not feeling as yummy and delightful as you want it to, how can this idea of building a supportive ecosystem help you do whatever it is that you want to do? Whether that’s upgrading your current life a little bit here and there, or whether that’s like quitting your day job, launching a business, and creating $250,000 in revenue a year, every year, starting in the next 12 or 18 months?
And, of course, it can be anything. It doesn’t have to be a business or career goal. This could be like, how do I create a supportive ecosystem for myself so I can show up to my relationship with my significant other with kindness and boundaries? What ecosystem would you need to have in place so that you could show up that way in your intimate relationship?
Or maybe you’re trying to make a big decision in your life, like a decision about whether or not you want to have kids or whether or not you want to move to Iceland or whether or not you want to go back to school to study a different industry or a different kind of thing to do in your life.
What kind of ecosystem do you need to have in place to make that decision? What’s the place from which you want to make the decision? And then once you make the decision, what ecosystems do you need to put in place to support you in creating whatever outcome you want in a way that feels delicious to you?
Because here’s the thing, a lot of people know how to create things in a way that feels fucking terrible. A lot of people know how to create things from anxiety. A lot of people know how to create things while feeling super fucking stressed about it. A lot of people know how to create things because they’ll feel so guilty if they don’t work on them. But that feels fucking terrible and we burn out that way. And then we run out of energy and then we eventually can’t prod ourselves to do anything with those approaches.
So what kind of ecosystem do you need to go after the things you want to go after in a way that feels effervescent and joyful and alive and meaningful and yummy? I’m so excited about this idea and I’m so excited about this framework. And I really think it could help you move forward on things that you’ve been struggling to move forward on.
I think the framework of, well, what needs to be in place in the ecosystem, and then don’t get bogged down in designing and implementing the whole ecosystem. You can start the ecosystem just with, oh, well, I think one thing that could be useful here is getting my sleep in order.
So this week, I’m going to work on getting my sleep in order. And I’m not going to judge and shame myself that I’m not writing blogs. Or I’m not going to judge and shame myself that I’m not sending out intro emails. I’m not going to judge and shame myself that I’m not having that difficult conversation with my wife yet.
For now, what you’re going to do is you’re just going to implement the one thing into the ecosystem that you decided you were implementing. And you’re going to praise and celebrate yourself every step of the way. Because what we praise and celebrate, we do more of.
Okay, so come find me on Instagram and tell me what you are going to use the supportive ecosystem to facilitate in your life and career. And you can tell me publicly on one of my posts, or you can just DM me privately and let me know what you’re using this or any podcast tool to create because I’m obsessed with these tools. And I’m obsessed with building a good and meaningful life and helping y’all get to build good and meaningful lives too. And I want to know what y’all are up to, so come let me now.
And if you want to work with me privately on creating a supportive ecosystem that sets you up for success with your specific goals and just generally in life so that you can have a yummy, wildly satisfying life, I do currently have space for a few one on one clients. And I would love to have a conversation with you about what you want to work on and what you want to accomplish and whether I would be a good fit for that.
And I also have another group of Satisfied As Fuck coming up very soon. So if you would rather do that work with me and a group of amazing women and assigned female at birth non-binary people, you are welcome to join us over there. It’s going to be a fucking riot and a delight and we’re going to get a lot of shit done.
And if you want something just a little bit more extra, I do have my yearlong coaching and mentorship program, Unhinged As Fuck, where we work together with one on one coaching for a year and multiple in-person or virtual deep dive days where we spend the whole day coaching and figuring out a different area or multiple areas of your life.
And if you’re ready just to dip your toe in the waters, I do have a totally free small group coaching call at the end of July. I think it’s July 25th at 12pm Pacific, but you can get all the details by getting the link in my Instagram bio and we’ll put it in the show notes too.
All right, that’s what I have for y’all today. Have a glorious Wednesday. Or if you’re feeling like me, glorious and sad, glorious, and disappointed because, y’all, it can be both. All right, have a lovely week. I’ll talk to you later. Bye
Thank you for listening to Love Your Job Before You Leave It. We’ll have another episode for you next week. And in the meantime, if you’re feeling super fired up, head on over to korilinn.com for more guidance and resources.
You are listening to Love Your Job Before You Leave It, the podcast for ambitious, high-achieving women who are ready to stop feeling stressed about work and kiss burnout goodbye forever. Whether you’re starting a business or staying in your day job, this show will give you the coaching and guidance you need to start loving your work today. Here’s your host, Career Coach, Kori Linn.
Hello, darlings, Happy Wednesday. I hope this finds you very well. I’m doing okay. I actually am a little sad. So I have been watching The L Word Generation Q, which came out a while ago. I think it started coming out before the pandemic and I don’t even know when the other two seasons came out.
But I have memories of watching season one at a friend’s house in Seattle. And I sort of didn’t keep up with it. I often don’t keep up with shows as they come out live. The only reason I watched it when it came out is because so many friends were watching it that we were having little watch parties, which was super fun, and I did enjoy that. But I like to binge things, so I like to wait until they’re out and then I can just watch them as fast as I want to.
So it kind of fell off my radar for a while and then I was like, oh, I’m going to watch that now. And then when I went to watch it I realized that it had been canceled after season three. And then I was super bummed, but I still wanted to see what happened because I had followed these characters through season one and I watched all the original L Word seasons also. So some of the characters are in both, right? The Generation Q is kind of a continuation with new characters, it’s not a total spin-off.
Anyways, so I was preemptively already sad that it was going to not keep going forever and ever, amen. But I watched it anyway and it was really enjoyable. Like I really liked The L Word Generation Q. And then, of course, I ran out of episodes because there were only two seasons for me to watch.
And it was funny, as it was coming down to the final episode of season three, I just slowed down the speed at which I was watching them. It was like I just was like, no. I was grumpy and upset that it wasn’t going to continue and then I kind of avoided it a little bit because I was like trying to – It wasn’t really savoring, it was sort of like the antithesis of savoring, like avoidance where I was like, I don’t want it to be over so I’m just going to ignore it. And then finally I did watch it a few days ago.
And, of course, I don’t think they knew the show was going to get canceled, so there was lots of – Like there was some stuff that kind of came together, but there were lots of little pieces of like, what will happen with this? And what will happen with these people?
And I just feel a bittersweet longing and sadness that I actually did look up, like is there fanfiction? And there is, but fanfiction is usually about alternate universes, I mean, I don’t know. Usually, I don’t read that much fanfiction, although I do like it. But it doesn’t carry on the main line of the show. And that’s what I really want.
So I’m just feeling some sad feelings. And that’s okay, it’s a totally normal part of human life. Feeling disappointed is not my favorite emotion, but it is a beautiful thing. There was something I really liked and enjoyed and it’s over now. And that tends to be what happens with everything we like and enjoy because things are finite, right? Even life. So just to go super dark and deep right away. Happy Wednesday, you’re welcome.
Anyways, that’s not what we’re going to talk about today. But if you are having some sadness or some feelings of disappointment, I do have some really good podcasts on those as well and they’re available for you whenever you need them. But today we’re going to talk about how to build a supportive ecosystem.
And this is something I was thinking about because I was coaching a client and they were talking about wanting to do something. And I don’t actually even remember which client it was. Usually I ask the client permission, but I don’t remember who I was coaching about this. But basically, I was like, what needs to be in place for you to be able to do the thing that the client was talking about wanting to do?
And so originally this podcast episode was going to be about the idea of prerequisites, like what are the prerequisites you need to have in place? But I sat down to kind of write my thoughts out a little bit, which is actually really unusual. I just get on here and kind of talk about my ideas. But this time I was like, let me think through an example.
And as I was thinking through the example, I was like, oh, this isn’t just about prerequisites, this is about building a supportive ecosystem. Or the first phrase I actually came up with was a success ecosystem. What is the ecosystem that supports success for you? And there’s two layers to this. There’s what is the ecosystem that supports success for you generally, like in an ongoing way, like a maintenance way? And then there’s also what is the ecosystem that supports success for very specific goals that you have?
So those two ecosystems may be the same, but they may not be the same, right? If you have a very specific goal you’re working on, that may require a customized ecosystem for that specific goal. And then I think there’s a general way in order for you to be satisfied, in order for you to feel peaceful and content, what needs to be in place in your life?
So I think it’s easier to talk about a specific goal ecosystem. And the example I came up with when I was writing notes before recording this was the idea of starting a business and running a business. And it’s interesting, because when you think about the idea of prerequisites, I do think some people use prerequisites to slow themselves down. They’re like, oh, there’s too many things I would have to have in place first. And then they kind of get bogged down in the details of those too many things, then they never get going.
And then I think other people have the opposite thing, right? And neither of these are a problem. They’re just kind of tendencies to be aware of. So what some people do is they just start something without figuring out what the skills and habits and whatever they need to have in place are. And then they figure it out as they go.
And I think there can be benefits to both of those ways of doing things. And there can be drawbacks as well. And I think framing them up in the idea of an ecosystem can be really useful. Like, what do you actually want to make sure it’s already in place in the ecosystem before you get started or as you’re getting started? And what could you build into the ecosystem as you go?
So, as an example, when you think about starting a business, there were a lot of things I did not have in place. It was a bit spontaneous. I mean, I’d been talking about it for years. But kind of making the decision that it was the time when I was going to do the thing, leave the job and start the business, it was a bit spontaneous and kind of a bit tantrum-y, if I’m being really honest. My coach at the time was like, okay, we’re either going to focus on you going all in on loving this job, or we’re going to focus on you going all in and building a business.
And even though my podcast is called Love Your Job Before You Leave It, I decided to go all in on building a business. And there were a lot of great things about that, there were also a lot of not so great things, which is why I think you can do it either way. But the skill of loving your job is actually a great thing to learn while you’re still getting a great paycheck and health care, because I then learned that in my business while trying to support myself with my business. And again, I wouldn’t necessarily go back and change it, but benefits and drawbacks to everything always.
Okay, so a lot of the things I didn’t have in place. But one thing I did have in place when I quit my job was I had some money saved up. Now, in retrospect it wasn’t very much money. At the time I was like, “This is so much money.” But people are always like, oh, have six months of runway or 12 months to be able to support yourself. That’s not how much money I had.
I’ll just share with you, I had $15,000 in cash, which is a lot of money. But also, I was living in Seattle, actually with really, for Seattle, extremely cheap rent. But it wasn’t that much runway. And so there was a period of time where I had spent all that money and I wasn’t really making money yet. And it was not my super favorite thing. It was very uncomfortable.
But at the time, $15,000 was enough for me to be like, okay, I have this in place, I have these resources. And I had paid off my student loans earlier that year. I’d gotten, I think, a bonus. I guess we got yearly bonuses when I was in my corporate job. And I had used that bonus to pay off my student loans. And then I had used the money also to buy the coaching package that I was in as a client where I got the coaching of love it or leave it, basically.
So I had no debt and I had cash. And so that was part of what allowed me to make the somewhat spontaneous decision to leave the job. And there were also other things I had in place that I don’t know that I was really cognizant of. But when I was making my list, I was like, oh yeah.
So the list that I wrote is like, what are the skills you need to have? What are the habits you need to have in place? Is there an amount of money you need to have to feel like you have a supportive ecosystem for whatever particular goal you’re working on?
Housing is always a really big concern. If your housing doesn’t feel stable, it’s going to be much harder probably to focus on a goal or something like that. But also is the particular kind of housing you have, is your housing arrangement conducive to the goal or conducive to the ecosystem you’re trying to build?
Another thing I put on here was sleep, right? So, for me, sleep is really, really important. And probably sleep is really, really important for you, whether you think it is or not because human bodies need sleep to function well. And so I think about people having really big goals or things they want to work on, but if you are not getting good sleep or if you are struggling in other ways, listen, sometimes some of us struggle with sleep. I actually am one of those people.
And so I’m not saying you have to be a perfect or great sleeper in order to go after your goals. That’s not what I’m saying at all. But I am saying if I put in place the work and the effort to have sleep habits that really support me and that I generally get good, for me, sleep doing, then that ecosystem supports everything else I want to do. And that really matters for me.
Other resources you may need to have in place besides just financial resources, is there equipment that you need to have? So these are just all of the things that I wrote down off the top of my head, and there’s probably more. But I think the big ones are like skills and habits, right?
And so for starting a business or running a business, there’s skills like getting clients, serving clients, but there’s also skills like the back side of the business, like billing, there’s marketing, there’s dealing with your taxes, there’s dealing with all kinds of forms and paperwork and making sure you have the proper licenses, there’s getting insurance probably, depending on what kind of business you are.
And if you’re a business, like I’m a business that serves people with a service that is coaching. But if you’re a business that creates products, then there’s all kinds of skills and habits you need to have in place and maybe relationships around who are your suppliers? And where do your products come from? And how do they get from wherever they’re made to you? And then how do they get from you to your clients and stuff like that.
So there’s all of these layers of things. And I’m not saying this for you to get overwhelmed by them. Because again, we don’t want you to get so bogged down in this that you don’t get started. We just want you to think about what’s going to be really meaningful for me to have in place before I get started. What’s the version 1.0 of the ecosystem that I want to have in place before I get started? And then get started and then what are the additional pieces you want to have in place?
And keep in mind that, again, it can be really beautiful to put things in place before you get started. And then you’re definitely still going to have to put some in place after you get started because some stuff you just don’t know you need until you know you need it, or you just don’t know to even put it in place. And then one day someone’s like, blah, blah, blah, blah, and you’re like, oh shit.
For me, it was like someone was like, oh, Seattle business license. And I was like, what? So I had to get a Seattle business license after I’d already been in business for a while. And I basically paid some fees because I told them like, oh, here’s when I actually started my business. And they were like, cool.
So I had to buy like two years’ worth of Seattle business licenses at once. But it wasn’t like I was in big trouble. You’re probably going to miss some stuff when you’re setting up your ecosystem. Don’t beat yourself up about it, that’s just how shit goes and then you just have to navigate it once you learn about it.
Okay, and so those are the business things, but let’s also remember personal habits, right? So, for me, my sleeping habit is really meaningful. My habit of taking long walks every day is really important for me. And it’s important for me in how I feel in my physical body, but I actually think it’s also important for me in how I feel mentally and how quick my brain works and how readily I’m able to use my faculties.
And then I do physical therapy most days. And that’s to help me feel good in my body, which maybe isn’t directly tied to the ecosystem of success for my business. But in some ways it is because if my body is causing me pain, or like last year I had knee pain. Was it last year? I think it was last year. Last year or two years ago, there have been so many times in my life when I’ve had knee pain.
So I had some knee pain and there was the pain of it and there was the rehab activities of going to physical therapy, like to the actual physical therapy office and then doing the physical therapy things at home. But there was the mental anguish too.
And we talk so much about mental anguish on this podcast of my brain being like, oh my God, what if it never doesn’t hurt to walk again? Or what if I can’t take long walks for the rest of my life? Because I’m used to being able to take these long walks and when I had the knee pain there were some days I could barely make it around a block or two blocks.
And it was where I was at the time and that was fine, but then the mental anguish was like, what if it’s like this forever, and like blah, blah, and grieving. And then being mad at myself because did I injure myself with running or whatever activity I’d done before the knee pain?
So in that way, there was actually a high cost to the ecosystem beyond just the actual pain. There was this mental cost and then I had to coach myself about it and soothe myself about it and comfort myself about it. So even though the knee pain doesn’t seem to be directly related to business goals or running a business, it can kind of impact that ecosystem anyways.
So if you have a goal that you’re working on, either a specific goal or an ongoing goal, like in a way starting a business is a short goal. But running a business is an ongoing goal, right? It’s sort of like having a life that’s wildly delicious and delightful, that’s an ongoing goal. You’re going to need an ongoing ecosystem.
And the ecosystem will probably change as you have different new micro goals or little interests or particular obsessions that run for a certain amount of time, as those come along it will ebb and flow. But what do you want to have in place and what can then you learn as you go?
So if you either have a specific goal you’ve been working on, or maybe you have a goal that you haven’t been working on, or if your life is just not feeling as yummy and delightful as you want it to, how can this idea of building a supportive ecosystem help you do whatever it is that you want to do? Whether that’s upgrading your current life a little bit here and there, or whether that’s like quitting your day job, launching a business, and creating $250,000 in revenue a year, every year, starting in the next 12 or 18 months?
And, of course, it can be anything. It doesn’t have to be a business or career goal. This could be like, how do I create a supportive ecosystem for myself so I can show up to my relationship with my significant other with kindness and boundaries? What ecosystem would you need to have in place so that you could show up that way in your intimate relationship?
Or maybe you’re trying to make a big decision in your life, like a decision about whether or not you want to have kids or whether or not you want to move to Iceland or whether or not you want to go back to school to study a different industry or a different kind of thing to do in your life.
What kind of ecosystem do you need to have in place to make that decision? What’s the place from which you want to make the decision? And then once you make the decision, what ecosystems do you need to put in place to support you in creating whatever outcome you want in a way that feels delicious to you?
Because here’s the thing, a lot of people know how to create things in a way that feels fucking terrible. A lot of people know how to create things from anxiety. A lot of people know how to create things while feeling super fucking stressed about it. A lot of people know how to create things because they’ll feel so guilty if they don’t work on them. But that feels fucking terrible and we burn out that way. And then we run out of energy and then we eventually can’t prod ourselves to do anything with those approaches.
So what kind of ecosystem do you need to go after the things you want to go after in a way that feels effervescent and joyful and alive and meaningful and yummy? I’m so excited about this idea and I’m so excited about this framework. And I really think it could help you move forward on things that you’ve been struggling to move forward on.
I think the framework of, well, what needs to be in place in the ecosystem, and then don’t get bogged down in designing and implementing the whole ecosystem. You can start the ecosystem just with, oh, well, I think one thing that could be useful here is getting my sleep in order.
So this week, I’m going to work on getting my sleep in order. And I’m not going to judge and shame myself that I’m not writing blogs. Or I’m not going to judge and shame myself that I’m not sending out intro emails. I’m not going to judge and shame myself that I’m not having that difficult conversation with my wife yet.
For now, what you’re going to do is you’re just going to implement the one thing into the ecosystem that you decided you were implementing. And you’re going to praise and celebrate yourself every step of the way. Because what we praise and celebrate, we do more of.
Okay, so come find me on Instagram and tell me what you are going to use the supportive ecosystem to facilitate in your life and career. And you can tell me publicly on one of my posts, or you can just DM me privately and let me know what you’re using this or any podcast tool to create because I’m obsessed with these tools. And I’m obsessed with building a good and meaningful life and helping y’all get to build good and meaningful lives too. And I want to know what y’all are up to, so come let me now.
And if you want to work with me privately on creating a supportive ecosystem that sets you up for success with your specific goals and just generally in life so that you can have a yummy, wildly satisfying life, I do currently have space for a few one on one clients. And I would love to have a conversation with you about what you want to work on and what you want to accomplish and whether I would be a good fit for that.
And I also have another group of Satisfied As Fuck coming up very soon. So if you would rather do that work with me and a group of amazing women and assigned female at birth non-binary people, you are welcome to join us over there. It’s going to be a fucking riot and a delight and we’re going to get a lot of shit done.
And if you want something just a little bit more extra, I do have my yearlong coaching and mentorship program, Unhinged As Fuck, where we work together with one on one coaching for a year and multiple in-person or virtual deep dive days where we spend the whole day coaching and figuring out a different area or multiple areas of your life.
And if you’re ready just to dip your toe in the waters, I do have a totally free small group coaching call at the end of July. I think it’s July 25th at 12pm Pacific, but you can get all the details by getting the link in my Instagram bio and we’ll put it in the show notes too.
All right, that’s what I have for y’all today. Have a glorious Wednesday. Or if you’re feeling like me, glorious and sad, glorious, and disappointed because, y’all, it can be both. All right, have a lovely week. I’ll talk to you later. Bye
Thank you for listening to Love Your Job Before You Leave It. We’ll have another episode for you next week. And in the meantime, if you’re feeling super fired up, head on over to korilinn.com for more guidance and resources.
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